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i guess for me it's not about curing vs. changing vs. letting be--it's just about being a parent, acting from a place of love and responsibility, like with any child, spectrum or not. i don't get the puzzle: hmm, shall i cure my child of this disorder that has been addressed to varying degrees in other ASD kids and ended up relieving a lot of confusion and fear? or shall I change them, which is, of course, impossible? or shall I try to change the way they percieve and therefore feel and act, which is possible? or shall I jsut let them be. and what exactly, does that mean, to just let them be? i just can't wrap my mind around what that would look like.

parenting is all about providing for the child, to allow for their greatest freedom and happiness, in all areas. for me, the education, ie. academics is far less important than the social developmental. the academics will come. there are amazingly brilliant highly educated people out there on the spectrum who lead lonely frighenied, isolated, and painful lives. i might make us feel better to see verbal educated autistics out there but that doesn't necessarily reflect on their quality of life.


Whether to cure or change, or just let be--we all go through these questions every day, and not only in regard to biomedical "versus" other interventions. Even thinking through the right kind of education for our kids brings out a lot. Thanks for your post!

Wade Rankin

Very well said, indeed.


Kyra, When I read a post like this I realize just how far I am from being the kind of Mom you are. You are a pillar of strength, of clear-eyed and vigilant love backed up by astounding brilliance. I feel so *lucky* to know you.


Kyra, I tagged you. You're it. Check out my latest post.


I know I say it all the time, but my life would have been so much different if some people I know were even 1/10 of the mother you are.

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