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as usual love you write it all SOOOO well. COULD not have said it any put into words ALL I feel or have felt with my own Noah.....and as usual I can SO relate. Been there done that myself...yep....all so true. We have to be pretty special moms I say!


This is so wonderful to hear. I felt very much the same about G. When they dropped the "A-bomb" as Marti says, I was incredibly shocked. But then I realized how much it made sense.

You are doing a fantastic job, and I am so glad I get to read about it.


How is it that you can make me weep and smile all at once?

Have another one. Two is magnificent. And so are you.


yes, eileen. intuitive is key!!! i guess i exagerate in this post since i never LOST my intuition. all i've been operating on since becoming a mom is my intuition and i guard it fiercely because i believe in it so much. it's why i've been able to do what i know in my GUT is right for fluffy and not hand over my decision making mind to the 'professionals' who push social skills groups and the notion that fluffy MUST BE IN SCHOOL to practice being with other kids and whatever else they think is right for him. i've stuck to my gut and in the process, i've met some amazing professionals who've taught me a lot.

i was talking about how hard it is for parents of kids on the spectrum because they miss out on FEEDBACK from their kids, this sensical and critical feedback loop that happens with NT kids. in some important ways, we don't get things BACK from our kids. Fluffy gives me things back, sure, but all i have to do is spend 3 minutes with an NT kid and the difference blows me away. they are THERE. they want to CONNECT. they are involved in the RELATIONSHIP. they are responsive and able to be fluid and moment to moment with you in ways that ASD kids can't because they lack the flexibility of mind, the competence, the experience. NT kids won't let you get away without helping them understand the world, they say, what's this what's that teach me this what do you think of that oh! i want to do that let's do this wanna do that? come on, let's go!! you get to do what parents are here to DO, to show them the world, help them make meaning out of it, help shape their minds. without that aspect of parenting, you can be left with lots of the caring for them, feeding clothing protecting without much of the meatiest thing, the sharing experiences together in a meaningful connecting fluid way.


Intuition is key. I have lost mine here and there along the way with reading too much and listening to too many "professionals". I think it is true that I noticed something not right with Andrew so early on because of having Brian. I remember feeling "what was I doing wrong". I remember at 20 months when I felt so much pressure to give him all the hours of ABA and what not that I really did lose my intuition. I still stumble along the way, but find that I always come back to that intuition and when I do I see the difference in Andrew. I just need to figure out how to keep it. I am very excited for you and Fluffy and am so looking forward to reading more!


This post makes me feel so happy, for a number of reasons. Because I too have recently discovered WHO my son is...due to crap outside my parental relationship with him, I was kind of intuitionless also tho not to the extent that you experienced.
Because I love the growth for all 3 of you and seeing you feel happy and confident, 'cause all of us watching KNEW you were/are an AWESOME mom who's been giving Fluffy every single bit of energy you have.
I'm just happy, happy happy. Love you all.

Kristina Chew

Sounds like you are set to move on from being an Apprentice to a Novice and up to a Vovayer. Onward!


I like your boobies, too. You are always so inspirational. I hope I find my way with my thing. I feel so lost and this gives me hope.


I think you have the stuff for it too :-D

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