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Loubouin Shoes

Your article let I have learned a lot.

Karla MG

Hi. I've been reading your blog for a while now. My intermittent explosive, traits of Asperger's, traits of ADHD 7 year old has so many similarities. The accompanying sensory integration and the "more than traits" things we keep seeing with him just compound it all... the rage, the innocense, the intensity, and the deep anguish and apologies when he finally does realize. And then we add the intentional, well planned behaviors, that in his mind make perfect sense. This post is just so eloquent and thought-provoking...I'll be pondering it for some time to come!

Thelxi Gladstone

Being unable to play, so standing in the midst of it, almost as a silent protest is something Ben does often. And yes, he's lashed out and yes, he's been punched because of it. Your story is my story to the letter, though I certainly could not have expressed it so eloquently. We'll get there. I want it now, but we'll get there.


well I can totally relate to all your feelings......and worries......fears. When Noah was younger he had a very very difficult time with lashing out if something like the above that happened to Fluffy would happen to him. He was not verbal much at all and got so overwhelmingly frustrated at anything that upset him or he could not communicate about to others. Needless to say this caused all sorts of problems for him in the public school setting. We had to watch him like a hawk everywhere he went......any play areas....parks...etc...because we never knew when he might "react" and freak out for a bit. It is so difficult not to be able to predict anything but the unpredictable happening.

As he has gotten older he has gotten better....because he is now more verbal and has learned other ways to communicate and rid himself of some of his frustrations. BUT....if I even ask him to repeat something he is saying to me twice he can lose it.....and I mean lose it! He will occasionally even try to push me or lash out hitting me or trying to bite me. These are rare.....but sometimes it is his initial reaction. AND he too is soooooo naive when it comes to hurting someone or the seriousness of some of his actions...etc. Noah actually likes to be banged into and that sensation so he could not understand why other kids did not enjoy him body slamming into them. He still does not get that.

Anyway.....I had not heard about the 16-year-old yet....that is scary and makes me worried that more will demand our kids be sectioned off into areas by themselves for fear something like this will happen again....when the truth is it could be anyone's child losing it for a few moments and making a fatal mistake that would change their lives forever. We just have to do the best we can. I have chosen to NOT put Noah into a public school environment ever again if I can keep from it. He just does not do well there and it is too much for him to handle. Hang in is scary but we all know you are doing the best you can! {{{{{{{HUGS}}}}}}}}}


Oh, God, I totally understand how terrifying that is. You are such an amazing mother, you really are. You are my constant inspiration and strength, I know Fluffy's going to keep passing through the stages and he will be okay.



Oh my. I think I'm still computing this and don't know what to say, but the whole thing makes me hurt.


There's too much in this post, Kyra----too much---just as so often there is too much in our kids, for themselves to handle, at least in the case of Charlie. I used to think mainstreaming was so important, was _the_ goal----as he has gotten older, and I see how he struggles to cope with his anxieties and, yes, rages (and he can learn to, I have learned, as in his asking "I need break"), I think that being in a self-contained classroom has many benefits, for Charlie---being in a place where he can feel and be and keep safe, and everyone around him too.

Hug to Fluffy and all of you.


I'm shaking. I'm scared, I'm sad for the dead boy's family, my heart breaks for the family of the Aspie, and I'm terrified for the Aspie himself. I see SmallBoy fly into rages like Fluffy's whenever things don't work/run/go the way he wants them. I just can't fathom him doing something like that...but, that's the mom in me, seeing my child as learning everything I teach him, as able to stop himself in a rage...clearly, we know that's not the case.

These kinds of stories, sadly, are the ones that make people (Ex) discriminate against children/people on the spectrum (SmallBoy)...because they've heard one bad thing or only bad things and never ever looked any further.

We need to get out there and raise awareness so that people aren't afraid when they hear "austism" or "asperger's".

My heart is breaking for these families.

Laura Cottington

I got chills when I read this today. I understand, feel, empathize with everything you wrote. Oh, Fluffy, I can just feel how you felt. I have been struggling in my head earlier today to write about our morning in relation to the young man who did the stabbing. I am too frustrated, as I read others blogs, in the autism community who are arguing about it. You my dear friend, have helped me make the most sense in what I have been feeling. I hope I can put my drafted post up sometime, as I don't want to offend others who gloss things over. I am moved.

Ann D

My youngest has these eruptions of rage at school. Sometimes he just screams/swears; other times he hits. It's so frustrating and heartbreaking because although the other kids cut him a ton of latitude (they get that he's "different"), but they're getting older and more and more they want him to "get with the program"). The school is amazing. I worry what will happen when he has to leave after Grade 6. We don't know where he will go next. Going back to his old school is not an option EVER, PERIOD. (If I say anyting more about it, I'll be the one swearing.)


kyra, all i can say is this: your writing and writing and never stopping shines here. reading this as just a reader, it is so gorgeously written. you reach right off the page and touch the reader and that, the touching, the communicating, i think is the real reason for writing to exist. i am awed by the talent you possess.


The most horrible things in the world are possible, but so are the most wonderful. Hold onto hope.

Vicki Forman

Incredible. Just lovely.


I have been thinking a lot about the 16 year old boy too. I have been thinking about the kids that I taught in highschool and how I could see the rage, the hurt, the not knowing how to make friends in their eyes and how they were so misunderstood by so many of their peers. It IS all very haunting, and sad.

All you are doing for Fluffy now will make the difference in how he continues to grow and understand his world, it already has.


Oh Kyra, that was so incredibly beautiful. And sad. And it goes right to the heart of many of my fears. I had to stop reading in the middle and come back to it. Now I think it will stay with me.

At least until Spring :-)


It is the saddest thing, I could not stop thinking about both 16 year old boys when I heard that horrible story. You used the right word - haunting. I think of my own daughter, and of her doing something horribly wrong and not understanding.

And I am sorry the open house didn't go that well! I have had many many many moments like that and I know how it feels. It feels crappy.



I can't breathe. I just. can't. breathe.

I'm with you, my friend.


you made me cry.

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